Tip Jar – Michelle Adams’ blog about balancing your work-life blend

In celebration of our 15^th anniversary, I want to dedicate this year’s entries to all the people who have shaped and influenced our business and, ultimately, my life. To maintain confidentiality, I will change their names; however, I hope their stories and lives will inspire and challenge you as much as they have me.

I can’t think of a better place to start than my parents. They have been so much more than loving, supportive role models for me. They have unconditionally believed, sometimes even to my amazement, that I can do anything.

When it came to my choice for self employment, they were the first in line to support me. It’s interesting as I reflect back on it all: they were self employed most of their lives and struggled to make it. The easy road would have been to encourage me in another direction. I’m sure I would have listened. But they knew more than I. They saw something in me that I didn’t even realize: I could do it.

Looking back, it’s inspiring to have people whom you love and admire so much believe you are unstoppable. I think it was some of their mistakes in life that led to this unwavering belief that I was the most beautiful, intelligent, hardworking, and giving person they’d ever met. It’s true that the good does stick to us over time. Whether or not I’ve lived up to all of their expectations is still a work in progress, as they continue to have the very highest of expectations for me. But regardless, thanks mom and dad for everything… the road less traveled has been a wonderful adventure.

Almost every client I meet with these days wants to discuss social media/marketing. It’s exciting! They are either twittering, blogging, opening up a Facebook account, or trying to monitor their kids activity on YouTube. Many of the conversations become blurred, though, as corporate America searches for the right mix of this media for their business.

Thousands of the world’s largest corporations are using these channels to spread their messages. But a huge mistake that many of them are making: they are advertising in these social channels instead of educating. The social marketing sites are largely about real conversations, transparency, and a pass-it-on mentality. So for you traditional marketers out there – think public relations. As you approach your social media/marketing initiatives – think about openly sharing your brand and relative information to your space. Think GIVE!

I’ve been at several cocktail parties lately where people have been discussing the status of their employment. It’s an interesting thread as almost everyone who commented is either unhappy with their current role, actively looking for something new, or wishing that they could. It started me thinking about self employment. Sure, there have been days that the grass seems greener. The idea of wonderful benefits, corporate paid training and development, four weeks paid (really paid) time off and stock options. It all sounds great on paper; however, I quickly come back down and realize that I’m obsessively committed to this. I started to think that maybe there is something about people who are destined for self employment – a sort of wiring.

When I came to this “ah-ha” moment over the weekend I saw how this has translated into other areas of my life. I’ve been discussing this pending adoption for months now. It truly has been one of the most testing experiences of my life. Imagine knowing that a child exists, holding him, and receiving photos of him, yet every day waiting for the call. Will they allow you to bring him home or will they call you only to say it’s not going to work out? It’s probably the tightrope we all walk; I just don’t think we think of it that way. We all assume that everything will be okay. It’s most likely a healthier way to live; however, this adoption has given me a deeper perspective of just how fragile everything really is. I did get a call and they are now telling us it will work out. It’s funny – after more than a year of working on this you’d think I would have been ecstatic. If I’ve learned anything about this process, though, it’s that it is unpredictable. So this mechanism took over and I’m proceeding with optimistic caution.

And then there are my children. Our middle daughter was diagnosed with a speech delay. At the time we jumped in and did what any parent would do – speech therapy. However, what took me years to truly understand is that it was an underlying symptom to future delays. I think people are afraid to tell you the real truth. We are a sugar-coat, freak-out society, especially about our children. Who wants to hear the hard things? We just want them to go away. She was having a very difficult time with school. It’s almost like she is a step behind. Our schools kept telling us everything was fine, yet I just knew that was the easy answer. Through networking, digging, and difficult interactions we finally got to the issue – dyslexia. It’s not easy when you push yourself or your entire family into completely unfamiliar and scary territory. You keep hoping along the way that you’re wrong, but there is something that just won’t go away – call it the voice in your head, intuition, or common sense – you just know. The best news is that we found this amazing jewel in our community – Marburn Academy. My daughter is receiving the help she needs and has made significant progress.

I started running two years ago. Truly it has been the drug that keeps me going. It can be 10 p.m. at night, and I must get it in. It’s my time. I clear my head and feel like everything comes back into perspective. Though these past several weeks a few things have started to hurt (knees, ankles, etc.); it’s really not terrible. A few friends told me this would come. They said it happens at 40. I really refused to believe there was an age. If I feel good, I can make it happen, right?

Reflecting on some of these truly painful (literally and figuratively) times of my life, one common denominator prevails – perseverance. Sure it would be easier to change every time something just doesn’t fit. I’m not advocating dying on the sword, but rather, a little nudging into those uncomfortable closets. I have found some of the greatest lights are truly at the end of the tunnel. It was Robert Frost who said – “I took the road less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.” I’m glad I did.

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